On feeling like the only truthful snake oil salesperson.

Had a new experience yesterday when I went to sell my unction at a ‘mind, body and spirit fayre’, the first time I’d ever been to such an event. Almost didn’t get there as there was a tremendous downpour in the hour before I left and the Purbeck roads were awash, briefly almost became a real island.

So, I get to this hall and set up my little stall in a room full of ‘alternative’ services and wares. To my right is someone doing ‘psychic nails’, suppose it’s another gap in the ever burgeoning nail decorating industry that’s been plugged. To my left a man doing pictures of your ‘spiritual guides’, people sit next to him and he then draws whatever he thinks is their spiritual guide. There is an abundance of tarot card readers, all sorts of crystal applications, a woman doing something involving numbers and areas of life where people sit opposite her probably revealing all their fears and anxieties which can then be reframed within her spiritual system for £25. Everybody’s looking for something, who am I to disagree.

Most people seem happy, except for the crystal hand-laying lady who has what Kate and the girls call a ‘resting bitch face’. People hang around stalls for hours, I feel slightly out of place and bury myself in the newspaper. I feel as if I am the only bona fide snake oil salesman, I even call it an ‘unction’, I experience existential angst.

I wander round the main hall and see all sorts of weird and wonderful wares, a rival selling ointments to energise your chakras, damn why didn’t I think of that? I resist the urge to run even though it becomes increasingly clear I’m a little out of place and won’t make much money. The first stall to pack up and go is the body shop franchise, at least I’m not the most blatant money grabber.

And then I read a report about how towns and villages are running out of hard cash, blimey brexit effect already hitting us in cold hard cash terms. Still, the plunge in the value of the pound will see more foreign visitors and even more foreigners buying up our housing, land, businesses and resources just as the grinning gargoyle wanted. And wasn’t it stomach churning seeing farage over in Yankland supporting drumf and giving silver back gorillas a bad name.

And listening to Richard Wolff and his monthly economic update he made reference to Samantha Bee. I looked her up (shit, almost anything you write or say is now viewed through a trump-fucked lens and becomes questionable), anyway , I looked her up on you tube and I think she’s great: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_gk72KC4jWc   especially the monologue at the end of this clip.

Have to go now as I have to get ready for a funeral and perceptions of those shift as one gets older.


Keep on keeping on, love Duncan



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